Why is it that since being pregnant people say such stupid stuff? I’ve written about this in the past in this post, but now, twenty-nine weeks in (!!!!!) I thought it was time for part two. So, here we go again with some gems from the world of “advice”.
“You won’t cope in labour” – what the hell do you know? Every labour is different and so is every person. And it’s not like you’ll be there to witness it anyway. Also, it’s not like I’ll be able to give up and go home half way through. If baby is coming, she’s coming. It’s not an optional endeavour.
“Should you be eating/drinking that?” Rest assured I know what I should and shouldn’t be drinking and eating.
“Oh, I can’t think of anything worse than having a baby due on Christmas day!” I can think of a lot of things that are worse than a baby due on Christmas Day. War? Famine? Stepping on a Lego Brick? Worm in your apple? Tripping and falling on your face? A headache? After three years of waiting she can have whatever birthday she wants.
“You’re pregnant. You don’t get dignity now. In labour you won’t care” – in labour no, I probably won’t care. But right now there’s nothing undignified about being pregnant. Right now I have as much dignity as the next person, thank you.
“Get your sleep now. You won’t get any when she’s here.” See, you must know how this works. You can’t bank sleep. It just doesn’t work like that. I can’t open a sleep savings account.
“No more collectables/candles/nice things now you’re going to have a baby” Why not? I really don’t understand this one.
“You don’t know what you’re letting yourself in for.” We have MET children. But also, no I don’t. We’ve never done this before. This is new territory. Good territory, but new. Thanks for the positivity though…
“When I had a baby you didn’t need that.” Good for you.
“That cost HOW MUCH?” Are you paying? No? Then do you get an opinion on how we spend our money? No you don’t.
“She won’t come on her due date.” 5% of babies come on their due date. That’s a low number. So that means 95% chance she won’t. But what kind of crystal ball do you have that you can be totally sure?
“Are you going to rehome the dogs?” I think I need to write a whole other entry about how infuriating these words are. No. We’re not going to rehome our FAMILY dogs. As they are part of our FAMILY.
“Leave something for the rest of us to buy!” Unless we have bought every single baby item from every single shop, there’s no need to say this. You want to buy stuff, feel free to. If you want to buy something that we don’t have, how about asking what we need instead of making silly comments? We have a handy list!
“Oh you’ll change your mind about that/ Oh you’ll see / Wait until she gets here.” Usually said about any kind of parenting choice from nappies right through to feeding. Apparently any ideas we have now will 100% change once we “know better”.
So, there’s some of the more ridiculous “advice” that we have been given. Luckily there are some actually really helpful things scattered in between too, and a lot of people have been very positive about this amazing adventure that we are about to embark on. We know it’s not going to be rainbows and unicorns all the time, but sometimes people just say the most ridiculous things and you have to choose whether to laugh or cry! Let’s try to engage our brains before we speak.
With eleven weeks to go, I would imagine there will probably be another instalment of “things people say”. Feel free to share the most infuriating things people have said to you about being pregnant/having children. Some of the stuff I have read and seen have been amazing!